Do You Hear What I Hear

Is it sleigh bells?  Is it a group of carolers?  When we aren't exactly sure what a sound is or where it is coming from, we lean in and listen harder to figure it out. When we have someone right in front of us telling us something, we don't always give them that same intentness.  Instead, our heads are reeling with what we are going to say next, what else we have to do, or making judgments about the person. Many people say they aren't being heard and chances are really good that they aren't.

How can you improve your listening skills? Here are a few simple things to do the next time you should be listening:
1)  Take a breath and focus your eyes on or next to the speaker.  (Step away from the television!)
2)  Repeat what they are saying, in your head.  Pay particular attention to their word choice.
3)  If appropriate, take notes.
4)  If there is something you don't understand or needs clarification, don't let your mind wander to try to figure it out.  Instead, politely ask them to hold up for just a second and ask them for the clarification.
5)  When it is your turn to speak, use the words they chose (when appropriate) rather than synonyms and people will feel they were heard.

Have a wonderful holiday.  I hope you hear lots of wonderful sounds, songs, and jolly conversations.

For more on improving your communication skills, join the 4 Dynamic Women on February 4 in Shoreview, MN for Dare to be Dynamic - The 4 Corners of Business Success.  http://www.4dynamicwomen.com/registration.html